


blind eyes

by Author_Authenticated



Category: N/A - Fandom
Genre: Original work - Freeform, Other, POV Second Person, prose
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-24
Updated: 2016-06-24
Packaged: 2018-07-16 22:28:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 797
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7287223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Author_Authenticated/pseuds/Author_Authenticated
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>a story of love told in second person</p>
            </blockquote>





	blind eyes

This isn't what you wanted. This is never what you have wanted. But this is what you get. No changing that now.

 

The dates and labels scrawled over your arms and hands are all you have left. They're blurring and washing off and will become forgotten. You met ??/??/??. You asked them out ??/??/??. They left ??/??/??. Time wasn't relevant when you were with them. Time is running out now.

 

The euphoria of romance was never built to last. Some people were just dead from the start. You cannot help those who are so certain with death, no matter how hard you try. Your love was not enough to keep them alive. Your never ending love and support was not enough to make them stay. The saying ‘if you love something, set it free’ has never become more relevant.

 

On the day they left, they asked one last thing. “Will you be okay if I go?” You were not going to beg them to stay with tears in your eyes. If they wanted to finally be happy, You said they should go. Who were you to decide their happiness? Why would they ask? It was not your decision to make. And with that, they vanished into the night, hoping to never be seen again. There were no breakups, no definitive ending. No finale. Just a broken “I love you,” and “I’ll miss you.”

 

It took you longer than it should have to realize all the mistakes you made. At first, in your naive nature, you devoted every waking moment you had to them, in memorial. When the realization finally hit, you realized what such a fool you were. How selfish they were for asking a decision you could not make. How ignorant you were to think they’d be happy gone, how broken you felt when you realized they weren't happy enough to stay. Love cannot cure death. 

 

It took them two weeks to return. Sudden. No precedent, no notice. Hell, you didn’t know they were back until they talked to someone else. Not a single word to you. Now, you had never discussed if they should return, they were so certain on death they had no Plan B. Nothing could prepare you for the week of suffering, dancing around the interactions with the other, until you finally spoke.

 

Their experience with death was surprisingly a lively one. They left, planning to never return, nothing more, nothing less. They were terrified upon their arrival back into the world, blinded by their history and past demons. With a new life, they lived.  _ Lived without you, _ of course. They spoke of emotions and feelings, but never of  _ Are you okay?  _ or  _ I’m sorry for leaving you.  _ No, of course not, you couldn't expect something from someone so selfish. Finally, the main event, enough to make you want to kill yourself, enough to want to hurt yourself in tortuous ways. 

 

_ ‘Actually… I’m dating someone else.’ _

 

The nail in the coffin, and the proceeding the funeral, and lowering you into the ground. You pretended as if your heart didn't stop, that the acidic tears in your eyes and ragged breaths weren't there. It hadn't been a week, and they had already managed to replace you? They didn't even tell you her name. After that conversation, the nightmares would not end. Staying up until 2 AM on school nights, writing poetry and wondering what made their heart stop beating for you. Listening to sad music and trying to find good in other people, the last of the good you saw of them.

 

It didn't take long to demonize them. Cursing their every breath, cursing yourself, cursing the words you scribble in the dark,  _ she doesn't love you like I loved you, I don't need you, I don't need you, she will never love you like I did, I hope you see me in every person you meet, I hope you miss me, because I will never take you back. I hope you suffer everyday for how you've hurt me, I hope you go blind, I hope your heart stops beating- _

 

_ I hope I can stop writing about you. I hope I can get over you, I hope I find someone who loves me and makes me stop thinking about you- you- you- you, with your green eyes and ‘hero complex’, hushed voice and asshole attitude, submissive under your breath moans, 3 AM freak outs and anxiety attacks, blinding memories of people you left behind- _

 

**_L_ ** _ et's  _ **_U_ ** _ nderstand,  _ **_C_ ** _ an't  _ **_A_ ** _ ntagonizing  _ **_S_ ** _ top?   _ **_S_ ** _ top  _ **_T_ ** _ he  _ **_O_ ** _ nly **N** egative  _ **_E_ ** _ nding. _

 

Save yourself before anyone else. Do not trust the pretty suicidal boy with green eyes and reticent smile. Let them go up in flames, your heart is worth so, so much more.


End file.
